All posts filed under: Life

I Have Arrived

Today, I’m very much grateful that I made notes of my teacher’s teachings (the one that passed away last year). As I read through them, I’m happy to see that knowing she was talking to a stubborn 30s me, that I can understand now what she was teaching, amazing me even more at the depth of her knowledge/wisdom. Sometimes I’d accuse her of being too harsh, and she’d say “I have toned down. I have nowhere near given you what I’m capable of.” Hahah, true. I’m grateful that I have ‘arrived’ at where she wanted me to be or see. There is always a repetition of “be” where you are, wherever and whatever I find myself in. And even if for a few minutes I indulged in missing her, acknowledging that she’s really gone, the feeling went away fast when I got distracted by a call and now there is only gratitude for more chances of learning and sharing and living and loving in this life, this body. Much love to you my friends. ♥♥

A Kindergarten’s Story

When I was in kindergarten, one of my elder cousins who was in high school would drop me off at my school, (my elder sisters & cousins would take turns in bringing me to school ‘coz we lived in the same complex) and while we were walking she would teach me stuff she’d learned herself, like an elder is supposed to. Like, “don’t shave your arms or your eyebrows next time, just the legs” or “don’t cut your bangs yourself, you won’t get it straight even if you use a ruler, reflections are elusive, now you look like a cat with that remaining fluff.” Followed with a giggle. For more practical stuff “when you’re grown up like me, and they give you those IQ tests and you don’t know the answer, always choose (b) because that’s where they statistically put the correct answers.” One morning while we were waiting for our ride, I was incessantly asking her question after question, she sighed and said that she had been talking with her best friend (a psychologist …

Week 21 on My Gratitude Journal

Grateful for this quote: Don’t believe what your eyes are telling  you All they show is a limitation. Look with your understanding, find out what  you already know and you’ll see the way to fly. ~ Jonathan Livingstone Seagull by R. Back (5/15) Grateful for today, because reflecting that my practice is now such that I don’t meditate and center in the morning, I miss it greatly, and even crave the silence that I am getting used to. So grateful for fruits of silence. Also for memories that kept resurfacing these past few days — of happy days from college, from when I was popular among my peers and for that young love I once had. 😀  (5/16) Grateful for a sense of peace amidst the outside chaos, knowing how blessed and guided my life is. So very grateful when I can step out of my own. (5/17) Everything is passing… Enjoy it’s momentariness. ~ Mooji Grateful for grace letting me know gently when I’m off or starting to zigzag, for joy in remembering. For a …

Week 17 on my Gratitude Journal

GRATEFUL FOR… Being happy and content right now. I love this life. So grateful! and for being open to the splendor of not knowing, making it up as I go along. Merrily, merrily, merrily… life is but a sacred dream.  (4/24)   Today, I release the need to know, and to figure everything out, to have all the answers all the time. I embrace the present moment and trust that I am being carried along in the Divine flow. I am grateful to just be. (4/25)   The almost incomprehensible thing that created the galaxies, and what is beyond them. That benevolent thing, the source of all that is, that energy which is only love all the time. I wish I could find a name that moves beyond gender and personification because God is so much bigger than that. (4/26) I’m reminded of my tag line, “gratitude moves mountains.”  Holy cow does it ever! The more I immerse myself in gratitude, things expand. Wonderful things happen, ideas come to me, I’m more creative, loving and …

Spring Cleaning and the Many Distractions

As I cleaned and discarded useless stuff I’ve collected over the years, I came across my old cassette tape player and what was left of my old cassette tape collection (I’m totally digital by now, but didn’t realize I had kept a few). I cleaned the player, tried the knobs and one fell off 😀 but I got it back to working again. I sat back and listened to Jewel, Sarah McLachlan, and Deep Forest while drinking my ice-cold tea. Jewel’s songs didn’t sound depressing as they used to. Nor did Sarah McLachlan’s. Deep Forest reminded me how excited I was those days to hear ethnic music being mixed with techno. That was before God created club dj’s. Deep Forest music is not a “mix”, it’s a merging of two different times, two cultures, two expressions. That was what their music was about. Eventually, I’m throwing all these magnetic and analog stuff out, (erm… but not my art stuffs, yet!) I wonder who still uses cassette tapes.. As I listened to Four Seasons as interpreted …

A Thousand Paper Cranes

Grateful for a friend’s story which reminded me to write something I’ve been wanting to share here but hadn’t felt ready to do. Last year my spiritual teacher died. It devastated me. In my grief, I felt spiritually anchorless, unsafe and unsure. She was a teacher who insisted she wasn’t a teacher but who taught me my major lessons, how to stand up to life but have confidence in its flow. When I first met her, I had to beg her to take me as her student, and finally she took three of us in, while grumbling the whole time that she wasn’t our bloody teacher. She was funny and loud, but oftentimes, soft-spoken, articulate and wise, and on rare occasions, ruthlessly decisive in her compassion. She kept pushing us to our limits but we always had lots of laughs with our practice. A year after she’d been teaching me, she sent me away and cut off our connection because in her view, I was getting complacent and wasn’t learning in her presence anymore. She explained, …

Walking As If In A Dream

I dreamt about walking. I was walking downtown, looking for the Cathay Pacific Air office so I could get my reserved plane ticket. I was walking, but wasn’t sure where their office was. And I thought, I am walking aimlessly. Then I was walking at the airport. I was carrying my bag, and I was walking with many people, we were walking inside the building, ready to board our plane. It was an international flight. I was “mindful” of my walking, I could see my feet walking, other people’s feet walking, I could hear everyone’s footsteps as we walked on the carpeted floor. I could see everything disappearing from my view as I walked past them. I was walking, and I thought, I have seen this in my mind before. And now it’s happening. This afternoon, I was reading an article “Making Each Moment Meaningful”. I was dozing off, until I realized that I was reading about walking. What woke me up was when I read this part: Walking As If In A Dream. I …